Liz discovers Alicia’s vast collection of dolls and comes up with the idea of ​​displaying Innocence on the Sea Wall.
Photo: Bravo
All week I’ve been reaching out to strangers on the street and preaching the gospel Rory And sharing the wonderful news that there are now six new icons (and Rulla) on our television screens every Sunday. But of course, the star of all the stars, at least for me, is the already famous Alicia Carmody. You might be thinking, How will she top last week’s episode, in which she admitted to recklessly hitting a woman with her car? Well, this week, Liz discovers Alicia’s extensive collection of dolls. “I think of it as an art form,” Alicia says, poetically describing how beautiful her dozens of dolls are. “The way they put eyeliner on eyeshadow, three layers along the lids, and everyone has a different lipstick with a little bit of glitter,” she says.
It is worth noting that these are not porcelain collectibles. They look like the Bratz-adjacent dolls you’d find in the toy aisle of Target. Nevertheless, they are treated with museum-like reverence; Alicia won’t let her daughter play with them until she promises to handle them “gently” (a word in which Alicia somehow hides another syllable). But Liz didn’t get to Alicia’s house to admire the doll collection, so their conversation soon turned to last week’s trip to the vineyard. Alicia feels bad for bringing up rumors about Liz’s relationship with amateur boxer, businessman, and convicted felon Dino Guilmette, even though Alicia wanted to give Liz a chance to set the record straight. After this, Alicia set her own record straight by explaining why she is not married.
As we know, Alicia has been engaged for nine years, but there are no chances of marriage. And coming from a family where five of her six closest female relatives are divorced, marriage doesn’t seem necessary to her – especially because her fiancé once tried to get her to sign a terrible prenup that would leave her with nothing. But the thing is, she probably won’t be left with anything even if she doesn’t marry, and a bad prenup seems to be a sign of deeper equity problems. Alicia says her fiancé refuses to put her name on his house, which makes me very concerned for this woman and her dolls. I said this about Kelsey, and I’m saying it again: Thank God this show is giving these women their own source of income so they don’t have to be beholden to the whims of suspicious men.
Meanwhile, Jo-Ellen is surprised by her husband’s invitation to “Rullala’s” vineyard, and is especially annoyed that no one thought to tell her until seconds before she arrived. It really feels like this is all code for the fact that Jo-Ellen didn’t know Rulla was cast on her show, and it’s thrilling to have her find out in real time that she’s being blamed for seeing this woman (and possibly going on multiple vacations). I need to see the footage of him cornering the producer for details: “Is he full-time? Or a friend? Who filmed with him? When did he sign the contract?” She’s clearly shaken by all this, but she also realizes that if this is the hand she’s been dealt, an on-camera eviction may be imminent.
Other than the debriefing after the winery visit, this was a great episode for dates. Rosie and her husband, Frank Sinatra, are celebrating their one-year anniversary — but all I can think about is whether we’ll ever get to hear her sing. I know Bravo can’t buy any Sinatra songs, but maybe an original? Or he can learn “Easy“By Mario Singer. Ashley Iaconetti and Jared have a date of their own, but they spend most of it talking about their money-pit coffee shop. It seems Kelsey isn’t the only polygamist — Ashley and Jared also have a third child named Audrey, and she’s ruining their lives.
Talking about Kelsey, she is also going on a date this week…but not with her boyfriend. Well, yes and no. She goes on a date with him, wearing a puffy purple tracksuit like Violet Beauregarde Other Lover, Bill. The Internet has now discovered that her longtime boyfriend, who lives in Miami half the year, is Judge Frank Caprio’s son John (who has also previously been linked to Paula Abdul), but there’s a “don’t ask, don’t tell” situation going on between him and Kelsey. So while he’s away, Kelsey is meeting Bill. As is obvious with almost everyone in Rhode Island, they both grew up together, and everything seems like a great match. The only problem is that Bill can’t afford her the lifestyle she’s living now. She says, “I don’t mind working, I can do it, I just…do I want to do it? No.” I would say this is a wrong approach to major life decisions, but the girl has 79 televisions, so who am I to judge?
Bill shows up at the Studio 54-themed birthday party that Liz straight up throws her husband out of wearing a crazy outfit And just like that… Reject pile. Kelsey makes it clear this isn’t her hard launch and Bill got his own invitation. Kelsey, along with Rosie, looks out of her element at the theme party, noting that her cultural knowledge base begins and ends with the Disney Channel. Despite the blowout performance, Ashley’s performance is better, and we get a mention from Jared that she once had Chippendales (Bravo editors disappointed us by not saving the photo). The party also marks Rula’s first all-cast event, which she attends with her philanthropist husband. “Look at Brian, coming in wearing two different outfits tonight. One as Studio 54 and then the other as faithful husband,” Alicia says. Queen.
Rulla and Brian bother me. Rula’s reserved, quiet demeanor while dealing with Brian’s cheating scandal (or ignoring it) reminds me of Camille Grammer in the first season of ‘B’. Beverly Hills; Everything is a display of control. Rulla refuses to let us see her sweat, or indeed let us see anything other than what she wants to show. For example, when she is talking about how rare divorce is in her world, a producer points out that she had been divorced before Brian. She paused before saying that it was not something she wanted to get involved in. This is her second episode and she’s already trying to escape, which is never a good sign. Devoted Bravo watchers know that you can never outrun the cameras.
Rulla and Brian quickly move on to Jo-Ellen and her husband, Gary, and the juxtaposition of their respective couple energies is unsettling. Jo-Ellen and Gary (who looks like Alicia’s doll in a shiny gold blazer) are fighters, and they’re going after Brian to try to get Jo-Ellen fired from her job in aesthetics. It’s almost shocking how Brian just sits there and complains that he never intended to fire Jo-Ellen and it was actually one of her friends who filed the complaint with her colleagues. Since all this is going on, other women are enjoying their lives. Liz is welcoming guests from the balcony like Evita; Dolores gasps at the mention of Cherry Hill, New Jersey; And Nosy Rosie is living up to her name, watching the drama unfold as an investigative journalist.
The whole time, Rulla is saying that Brian’s case is completely in the past. But Jo-Ellen, right in front of them, promises her children’s lives that he is still cheating. This unblinking behavior seems unprecedented for the franchise. “I just want to grab Rula and shake her,” Jo-Ellen says in her confessional, “but I can’t because then her hair topper would fall off.” Rula and Brian’s car ride home is extremely quiet until she asks why he sat there and didn’t defend himself. Well, I guess it’s hard to defend yourself if Jo-Ellen is right, but who knows!
Just when you thought the big bang of the party was over, Liz tells Kelsey that she wants to show people firsthand what their dynamic is really like by going to the sea wall with her husband and Dino. I don’t know why the sea wall is the place to do it, but anyway, Kelsey wisely suggests it’s not the best idea – which explodes Liz. She quickly moves upstairs and enters a room with a “Do Not Enter” sign, which leads us to the first hot mic of the show. This is why Liz is angry at Kelsey…pointing to the rumors Liz was also hinting at? The big reveal comes from Liz’s confessional, when she reveals that Kelsey is just “trying to get away from her story with Dino by pointing the finger at me.” Now what is that? Are Kelsey and Dino connected? Well, Liz doesn’t provide details, claiming it’s a question for Kelsey to answer. But, my God, what a web these women spin. And the best? Ashley completed the episode without crying.
